I am often asked how I am doing. You probably are frequently asked that also, as it is a very common question to ask and be asked. But now, the people asking me really do care how I am doing (not that they didn't before), and the question is asked with more feeling and emphasis. It is hard for me to answer, because I know what they are asking (How are you coping? How is your grief? How can we help?), and because there is not a simple answer. Some moments I am just so sad. Other moments I am happy. I have many, many things to be thankful for and be happy about. Wonderful memories with my dad make me so happy, but also make me cry because... that's it -- the end has come to making memories with him. What I have is what I have.
I am mentioning this because I think I will start blogging about both the happy and the sad, the funny and the painful. If it becomes too much, I will stop; but I want to see if it will help me. Not only to communicate with you all, but also to have this little journal to be able to look back upon myself.
So, prepare yourselves for the unexpected when you check my blog. You may read about something happy with cute baby pictures, or you may read something entirely different. To some extent my blog has already become that way, so perhaps this entry is my way of explaining it.
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2 comments:
Your blog has always been very diverse!
Your memories of the time you spent with your dad are building blocks for creating memories with our own children. You are like your dad in so many ways.
I look forward to both the happy and the sad. I wouldn't want you to be either all the time. I love your sincerity.
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